Sunday, 19 March 2017

Guest Blog Post: Self Love by Katy - Lexi Life

Why Self-Love Should Always Come First

Hiya I'm Katy from Lexi Life and I blog about all things beauty & lifestyle. I also vlog my every day uni life weekly which, I guess is pretty personal. But never have I written a personal or deep post. So here goes! Let me know if any of you can relate in the comments below.

A question I like to ask myself when faced with a dilemma is, tomorrow morning/next week/10 years from now, are you going to be happy you made that choice? Are you going to look back and feel overjoyed for making that decision or are you sat there face palming over and over until you get a headache?

The dilemmas I’m talking about are friendship based. Particularly, those horrible situations we often find ourselves in that involves agreeing to something where, at the time seemed like the best thing since sliced bread, but now, not so much. I’m almost certain everyone’s been there at some point in their lives. Luckily for me, that feelings pretty much non-existent now and I thought I’d share why. 

I know a lot of people preach that ‘saying yes to more things’ is the best ‘life mantra’ to have, but what about saying no? I’ve learnt to trust my gut & 9 times out of 10, it’s right. However, a lot of things are trial and error, I’m not saying you should reject every offer to meet up with friends or go for drinks. But based on previous experiences and how well you know yourself, the answers in there somewhere. 

Not going out and getting blind drunk is OK. Not wanting to bump into all of your old school peeps that are yet to grow up yet is OK. Not doing something that you don’t really want to spend your spare time doing is OK! Looking after yourself should always be number one. Self-love should always come first. 

But of course, saying no to things can come with some sort of stigma. Wanting to stay in with you Mum watching an ITV talent show (Ant & Dec Saturday Night Takeaway is my current choice) with donuts, blankets and a cat is viewed as ‘boring’. Putting on a pair of fluffy socks instead of a pair of heels is viewed as ‘dull’. Drinking INSANELY calorific hot chocolates instead of downing tequila shots creates the questions. For example, ‘why don’t you come out anymore?’, ‘why can’t you make it?’, ‘what are you doing instead?’. 

Self-love. That’s what I’m doing instead. Whatever’s right for me, I’m doing it.  Everyone’s journey with self-love is different, which is something that’s yet to be understood by many unfortunately. ‘Many’ being those people who can’t get their head around that fact you don’t want to do the things they like doing. The things you used to do together. Maybe you don’t want to go out and get plastered. You don’t want to be ditched for a guy they’ve spoken to for 10 seconds in the club. And you REALLY don’t wanna deal with the hangover in the morning. 

But I’ve learnt to tell myself that that’s more than OK to not want to do the things you feel pressured to do. I’ve learnt to put self-love first without missing out on opportunities that I may absolutely love. It’s a hard balance to get right. But saying no isn’t a bad thing to do.

I’d love to know if anyone can relate to this. I’m hoping this is a post that can make people realise they’re not the only one dealing with this and that I’m always always here for a chat. This is my very first personal kinda post and would love to know your thoughts and own experiences! 

Thanks Kirby at BWB for giving me the opportunity to, sort of vent all over the internet. 
You can catch me on my Twitter @lexilife95, Instagram lexilife95 & YouTube lexilife95

Lots of love! 

1 comment

  1. I completely agree with this! I often find myself putting myself out to fit in with others and end up exhausted from travelling to other people etc. I think it is so important to have "me time" and also prioritising the people that actually matter. There is not enough time to see everyone in life and so catching up with the best bunch is the way to go! xx


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